May at the Oak Table
Seasonal family life in May; the garden, the mental load, and finding small moments in a busy month
Some months arrive gently. May did not…and if you’re navigating the seasonal juggle of family life right now, with a garden calling and a to-do list that keeps growing, you’ll know exactly what I mean. This is slow living in theory. In practice it is raised beds and cricket kits and wardrobes that need completely turning out.
It came in warm and full of promise and then quietly changed its mind. The air has cooled, the skies have shifted, and yet the garden hasn’t got the memo. Everything is shooting up regardless, the cow parsley bobbing along the lanes, foxgloves reaching, poppies pushing through, and the rhubarb looking more confident than anything else out there.
We have spent the last week building raised beds, hauling soil, cutting back shrubs that had quietly taken over, and somewhere in between all of that doing the usual adulting. There is a limbo that comes with this time of year: so much needing to go in, space still being made, and a few things we would usually have sown by now still waiting. If you’re in the same position, I want you to know it will all catch up. The warmer months are ahead and seeds are more forgiving than we give them credit for.
I am tired in the best possible way. The kind of tired that comes from having given something real to the garden and the people you love in the same week.
I haven’t spotted the first elderflower yet but I am watching for it. Last year I didn’t hear a cuckoo all spring… not once and I find myself hoping for one this year. In the meantime, Daisy and I have started a new running routine, looping around the fields in the early morning, and we have been rewarded with woodpeckers. It was wonderful seeing how fascinated she was when she discovered one high up in the tree.
The phlox is growing so big and wild, so it is getting a Chelsea chop this week. Cut back hard in the hope of more blooms later and a better shape. It was a tiny thing when I planted it and now it takes up more space than I planned and I don’t mind at all. That is the thing about perennials. They just keep going.
Cricket season is back. Three of the four are very excited about their first matches this week, which means our weekends are about to look very different. I am already planning what to bring in a cool bag.
And somewhere alongside all of that, May has quietly announced that the wardrobes need dealing with. Thick jumpers bulging out, summer things buried at the back, and two of them suddenly needing new shoes at the same time. They are all shooting up and the evidence is everywhere.
It is the time of year when the mental load feels particularly full. Dates in the diary, school, work, home, garden; so many tabs open at once. And in amongst all of it we are apparently supposed to remember ourselves. My version of that right now is finding a window for a run with Daisy, remembering to wash my face at night, and taking my collagen. That is genuinely about my capacity at the moment and I am making peace with that.
The other non-negotiable is flopping on the sofa with Dougie for an hour before bed becomes unavoidable. We are currently watching The Chosen on Netflix, an interesting drama about life in a UK cult. We’re also very much looking forward to the next series of Rivals. If you watched the first series you’ll know, the 80s details were absolutely on point and it was just a lot of fun. And if you’re looking for something else entirely, we cannot recommend The Other Bennett Sister highly enough. A superb period drama, great humour, fabulous actors. One of those ones you’re sad to finish.
And this weekend, if the tiredness lifts enough, I want to make a rhubarb clafoutis. The rhubarb is more than ready and I have been thinking about it all week. I will post the recipe here when I have made it.
What does May look like where you are? I’d love to know what’s coming up in your garden, what you’re listening for, what you’re looking forward to.
With warmth, Charlotte 🌿
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