Emerging from Hibernation; Saved by Tupperware!
Balancing motherhood, work, hobbies, hormones and well, life...
I’m returning here to say sorry for going silent! After posting in January, I disappeared for weeks. My mind has been whirring as to how this space will work and in truth, I have been hiding away a little in the last stages of hibernation, when the last murky days of Winter feel hard to emerge from.
Life often moves at what can feel like an alarming pace and it’s resulted in me feeling a little bit stuck. Only last month I wrote a post on how I love January and how to reach for those small rituals that keep me content through Winter and yet here I am a few weeks later having lost that sparkle and feeling differently.
Stumbling a little lost through February with peri-menopause kicking my arse (one for a later post), with an uneasy sense of loneliness and a panic that I’m behind in most things has resulted in a frustrating creative block.
On opening up my phone, the algorithm gods show me reams of things that I would just love to learn and create. Easter tablescapes, sowing a billion seeds, relatable e-courses, homesteading tips, menstrual and lunar cycle advice, how to improve my gut, spring cleaning hacks and more! I save ideas for later, add them to my mental load and then afterwards fret as to when and how I can fit them all into my life. This busy humdrum with all of my usual daily demands is just not sustainable for me in February when the first rumblings of emerging from hibernation are kicking in.
Tom Rosenthal's (handle tomrosenthal1) lyrics on Instagram resonated with me “It’s all a bit too loud for me, it’s all a bit too loud, I am looking for serenity and someone to sit next to me, and write me out a recipe for getting through the day. As the world beeps away…. beep beep beep beep beep beep’
I’m pretty sure that all of the above will enhance my life, be lovely projects to complete, but doing them when I feel like this is just not going to work. Plus who has time to take on all of that in one go? Processing and ordering when and how to start these things is information overload. My friend and I often joke that we take on something nice and mindful and have the knack of turning it into an overwhelming chore that needs completing before we quickly combust! One such task that springs to mind is when I was determined to make a Christmas wreath by myself with a tight timescale and I ended up in tears with branches and pinecones scattered all over the kitchen table. Or the time I joked with an element of truth that I have almanac overwhelm from my four beautiful almanac books by the side of my bed.
Over the course of this month I have realised I simply need more time to process the start of the year, and this year the transition from Imbolc towards the Spring Equinox has needed to be slower paced. We all emerge in our own time from Winter and have different priorities, focuses and schedules and I have been hard on myself for allowing myself this time.
This past week or so, I have gone easy on myself. Intentionally and slowly leaning into turning off some of this noise on the extra things I could but don’t need to be doing. Instead, I have focused on self-care and the day-to-day of the home to get me through this last Wintry stretch. To quote Rosie Steer in Slow Seasons “For me, carving out small rituals every day has become my way to reclaim the light and change the narrative of busyness.”
Weirdly, I always feel ready to put one step in front of the other and take on more of the world when my home and wash basket are more manageable. So 2 weeks ago on a drizzly Sunday afternoon whilst the kids entertained themselves in their downtime from a busy week and my husband was catching up with studying, I set about on a prepping plan all cosy in my comfies and woollen socks. Jack Johnson songs shuffled on Alexa, my new fig candle burning I reached into the depths of the Tupperware cupboard!
Now, I haven’t quite gone all 1970s as I don’t have the OG Tupperware pots, although one small pot is tucked away in my baking cupboard filled with birthday candles (thanks Mum). Instead, utilising three fancy unused square glass IKEA containers with wooden lids and a cacophony of random-sized plastic pots, I set about chopping. Making my way through the salad drawer; separate pots for chopped fruit and then onto sandwich and salad fillers… cous cous, leftover cold pasta, grated cheese, tuna and leftover roasted chicken. Glass jars filled with nuts, flaxseeds, dried fruit and blueberry compote for our healthy porridge and pancake breakfasts. Filling an empty leftover festive Roses tub with a batch of healthy flapjacks and power balls using up all the honey and peanut butter for the week. This act of chopping didn’t feel like a chore it was weirdly soothing and cathartic.
The past two weeks my lunch hasn’t been the usual rushed piece of marmite toast and crisps. Instead an interesting salad of chopped crudites, fruit, protein, nuts and seeds. It’s made me feel like these prepped meals and snacks have been carefully considered and intentionally eaten. Plus, news flash, the kids have had less biscuit barrel action this past week.
Now I know that a therapist would tell me that Tupperware alone isn’t going to help me work through these bigger emotions and yes that would be right. Aside being saved by Tupperware I have taken pauses with writing and social media posts and set about improving our health, tweaked my sleep and added a couple of daily strength exercises into my week. I’m sure, in time I will have the brain power and strength to re-emerge and add in my creative projects.
Reminding myself that life is linear and how we feel one month can also be very different to the next. Just because someone has a row of beautiful spring bulbs, prepared veg beds and seeds sown has no bearing on whether I am ready to get out there and whip my garden into shape (but that also most likely needs tackling!) We all look to get from darker days to lighter ones in different way.
It’s so easy to forget to stop and reflect on how far we have come with what we have already done, remain present and then slowly put one foot in front of another. Good things take time. The endless scrolling and daydreaming of what is to come means there is time for the hard work to kick in and create these visions.